What if everything were flat?

My last post reminded me of a conversation that I had with the kids the other day: 'What if God hadn't made hills and everything was flat?'

It was actually a pretty interesting conversation. We began by listing all the things that wouldn't be so hard if everything was flat. But then I started listing off all the things that they WOULDN'T have or be able to do if there were no hills: no skiing, snowboarding or tobogganing, no mountains to look up at or down from, maybe even no lakes!

We all agreed that life would be pretty boring if everything was flat. It's easy to say that about the external; however, what about us personally?

Unlike rollercoasters, life moves (usually) at a much slower pace. So why do we so often live it like it IS a rollercoaster- always looking for what the next turn will bring instead of enjoying the view from where we are?

Sometimes the valleys feel like deep dark pits and we wonder if life will ever get better. It reminds me of a friend who was struggling with some post-partum issues- so a group of us went over to pray with her. The analogy that came to mind was that of dessert flowers. That might seem like an oxymoron since the dessert is such a dry and desolate place- but there are some very beautiful flowers that only grow in those kinds of conditions. And so that is what I prayed for this friend- that each day God would help her "see and pick" a bouquet of dessert flowers as long as she was walking that road.

That isn't to say that there isn't a whole lot of yucky stuff that goes with that, but we're commanded to 'consider it pure joy when we face trials of many kinds'. This isn't a deluded 'paste a smile on your face even though life seems to suck/pie in the sky ideology'. It's a 'I know that God is bigger than this and has promised to walk me through so, even though I may never understand WHY!??- I know that God is God and is in control and will make SOMETHING good come out of it, just because He promised He would. Lot easier said than done, though.

But you know, the mountain tops- where everybody says things are going absolutely amazing, also has it's own challenges. Mountain tops are actually very harsh, inhospitable environments. Yeah the view is great (especially from inside a building or gondola), but outside can be nasty.

I guess the difference is in the perspective. When you're at the bottom looking up- you realize how small you really are and how feeble you are to deal with things on your own. It would almost seem like these should be the awesome times because that's when we realize/see the power of God to make up our shortfall.

Maybe the mountain top is really a double edged sword. On the one hand, our earthly problems/situations/etc. look mighty small when your 20,000+ ft up! But on the other, it could be very easy to sit back and marvel over yourself for making it up there- thus possibly diminishing the power/role of God in your life. Which is probably why we usually quickly find ourselves back down in the valley!

There are ups and downs (literally- sorry, just had to put that in there, lol) to the landscapes of our lives. And, as much as it would be nice to not have one or the other at times- we need both.

God made hills, and it was very good.

Rollercoasters

Life is feeling like a rollercoaster lately. I neither link nor despise them, and as the saying goes- they have their ups and downs.

I think the part that unnerves me is that 'dropping' feeling as you go over the edge and plummet down the coaster- pushing you onward to the next twist, turn or climb only to do it all over again. Oh, and did I mention they go around in circles? The same thing over and over and over again. I think eventually it looses it's appeal the closer you get to loosing lunch.

But life seems to be like that right now. I'm trying to work through a book entitled 'Large Family Logistics'- hoping to finally find the method that will tame the madness of my life. Only I don't think my life got the memo that said to lay off on the chaos for a while.

The book has been very helpful for me in terms of giving me direction to each days' chores. I just wish that I could get them done. My kids are not independent students yet, not to mention the littles that can't be left alone in order for me to get things done. So I need to figure out how to motivate them onto the same page so that we can be working toward a common goal- a household that runs like a well oiled machine. Hm, machines- see rolllercoaster thoughts, see loop see recursive....

Then there's the whole rabbit trail that is questioning why I'm home schooling and how much longer I'll be doing it for. My parents have never supported this whole home schooling endeavour and think the kids would be better off in the routine of school. Unfortunately an incident came up with my oldest at youth a few weeks back that has really messed with me and question another aspect of why I home school and why I'm worried about sending them back to public school.

It mainly centres around behaviours- specifically poor choices that made other kids tease my oldest and made his life miserable. Bringing him home and keeping him away from that has given him back his life, so to speak. The light in his life is shining bright, and for that I'm grateful. However, I still see those same issues in him- and it caused a negative reaction in another person and my son got hurt. I'm still angry about it but it raised again those feelings of seeing my son as a problem child and how could I possibly ever send him out into the real world if he is still acting like that? Then I wondered if I was maybe keeping him home to protect me instead of help him? That I wouldn't have to deal with other people complaining about him if I didn't let him out of the house.

I found it a very scary road to travel and I'm not sure that I've really worked it out in my head. And honestly, lately I've been wondering if they'd be better off in the daily grind of school. At least there they seem to get their work done every day and I wouldn't have to worry about whether or not they were falling behind in things.

Then there are the good days- where one or more of them does their work without complaining and they get along and play really well together and we connect, and it seems like all the hard work is getting us somewhere and if feels good. I just wish that I could figure out what happened to make those days happen so that we could duplicate them a bit more often than they seem to occur naturally.

Only I don't think that we'd learn nearly as much if that was the case. I guess it goes back to rollercoasters- without the downs you can't have the ups, it would all be flat!